Hey Despair and Angst - love your work!
I've been thinking about what makes America so Great and I've spoken with lots of my friends. Good people - lovely people. Salt of the earth kinda people. And they've tried to set me straight but it is not easy. No, it's not easy. Sad. That's what it is. Sad.
Despair and Angst here - can I ask you a question Trump the Don?
What are you dealing with right now? I am soaked in despair #hashtag #bringbackthewall #whydofriendsturnevil
Look - I might have said that I was soaked in despair but that's not quite right. I guess that was me acting like a Democrat, and going all weak-knee'd at the prospect of waking up in the morning. That's just not me, right? #hashtag #bloodykoreans #northernkoreans #mybombisbiggerthanyourbomb
Anyway, let's get down to business. Because that's what it's really all about, right? Business. America IS business. America is BIG business. And I love America. AND Big Business. That makes me a Big American. Right? You bet I'm right! Right? High five for that one. #hashtag #FBIshouldinvestigate #everythingbutme
So thanks for inviting me here today.
[Ed: we didn't invite Trump the Don - he wrote in..]
They just group around, hanging around like they need to be near me - but I'm better than that. Did I tell you that? How good I am. No, actually - I mean, how really fantastically good I really am. Did I add a question mark there? Yeh? OK. #hashtag #spelleingisforlosers
As I was saying, I am so good - even my numbers are good. Better than anyone that's ever been on television. Or in movies. And I haven't even been in movies yet. Well, let's not go there - many worlds to conquer, right? #hashtag #chinesestealingactingjobs
So, after my inauguration crowds were forced back to work I got stuck into the job I was voted in by the Great People of this Great Nation to do Great Work for. Did you know that I've passed more and better legislation in a shorter block of time and for more good outcomes for more people in more places at more times with more impacts at more levels on more playing fields running more teams of people who love what I do because I'm so much More than anyone else. Ever has been. #hashtag #startnewbook #findwriter #howgreatwasI #trumphotelpillowreading
It's been great talking with you Despair and Angst. Why do some people call you Life's a Game? Yeh, I know. It's because you know it's me, right? And life's not a game - it's a Game Show! And I'm the host. Best Host Ever been on a game show in history. Did you see my ratings? Outshone that Arnie guy. #hashtag #getajobarnie #goshiamgood
If you're ever near one of my golf clubs, just knock on the door. Slide your shiny credit card down my slot and I'll show you a world like you've never seen. A Great World for Great People. You may not be great now but I've spoken with you, and if you follow my lead, you could be great too. Not as great as me, of course - that would be funny. He. Ha. Ha. #hashtag #fbitotrackdowntheseguys #suppresstheirratings
America Great again! Yeh! I'm Great - and I'll make America Great. I'll leave it as Great as it's ever been. #hashtag #no-wait #i'mnotleaving #notetoself #howtostayinpower #lovingthisstuff